Once Upon a Time
by Trickster-jz
Summary: This wasn't the ending she had dreamed of. Padme POV. Some RotS spoilers. Angst.


**Disclaimer**: I do not own anything—Padmé, the Skywalkers, etc, all belong to George Lucas. I am making no money off of this; please don't sue.  
**Summary**: This wasn't the ending she had dreamed of.  
**Character(s)**: Padmé Amidala Skywalker, Anakin Skywalker  
**Author's Note**: Okay, I'm nervous. I've been posting fanfic for a couple years now, but this is the first movie piece I've done. _Please_ let me know what you think?

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**Once Upon a Time  
By Trickster-jz**

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_Once upon a time I was falling in love  
But now I'm only falling apart  
There's nothing I can do  
A total eclipse of the heart  
Once upon a time there was light in my life  
But now there's only love in the dark  
Nothing I can say  
A total eclipse of the heart_

-"Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Air Supply

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**_Once upon a time, there was a queen. A queen so wise and beloved that her people desired to keep her as their sovereign forever and aye, if she might live so long. Once upon a time, there was a young lady, strong and independent and proud. She strived for her loved ones, for the defenceless and common; she wished only good things for these. When many did nothing, she gave all._**

_Only_ once upon a time, now. Once, Padmé had been strong. Once, she had known how to pick up the pieces of something as large as a planet, and put them back together again. Once, she had had such dreams…

Dreams of lofty ideals, such as liberty and morality and life. Normal, infinitely precious and selfish ones, too—of children, and love, and laughter. Of devotion, the beauty of her home, the grace of old age with her life partner. How she had once longed for these dreams' fulfillment. How stupidly certain she had been of their inevitability.

_Will she be happy?_ Of course! _But will she be loved?_ Is not everyone? So it was meant to be, to her mind; and because it should be, it would be. She _would_ live wonderfully forever after and aye.

**_Once upon a time, a righteous lady joined the Galactic Senate, and she stood up for her people. Unyielding, she was, to tyrants; unaccepting, she remained, of corruption. Once upon a time, a woman of the people fell in love with a knight. Unto dizziness, he wooed her with desperate words and loving looks and passionate kisses. When she had tried to run, had attempted to keep her heart within her own safe guardianship, he had called to her soul and it had come to heel. Once upon a time, a senator married a knight, though it was forbidden…_**

The threads had begun to unravel, when she stopped being practical. The searing passion between them was left untended for war, and it never bloomed into trust and domestic joy. The separations had burned her nearly as much as the desperate fire between them. Secrets, deceit, broken laws—these, they had built their relationship upon, and down it had come like a house of cards in a storm.

When had she realized that there was something fundamentally wrong? When had they fallen apart? She had tried to salvage their marriage—Force, had she tried! _Hold me? Like you did on Naboo…when there was only our love—no war, no politics …_

Her pregnancy had not brought him back. _This is a happy moment_, he had told her. _The happiest moment of my life_.

Yet still he had withdrawn.

**_Once upon a time, there was a woman in love. Helplessly, carelessly, she adored her husband. When she became pregnant, she knew all her dreams would come true: she would lay down the mantle of senator and return to her home to raise her child. Once upon a time, a woman _knew_ everything would be alright._**

Those damned nightmares ripped apart any salvaging she tried to do. Fear had enflamed him, taking him to a place she could not follow. Dreams of her death in childbirth—he took them far too seriously, and now she lay dying on a remote world because of it.

_I've found a way to save you, Padmé_.

Ani—her strong, handsome, passionate knight—sold his soul to the Devil, and then there was betrayal and death and tears and screams and slaughter and—

_I saw a hologram of him killing younglings_.

But, no! she had thought. Anakin was a _good man_, and the father of her child! Gods, Obi-Wan _had_ to be wrong. It would kill her if….

If Anakin could kill younglings, he could kill their child, and he could not do that.

**_Once upon a time, a wife was confronted with horrible rumours of her beloved. Once upon a time, she ran to her husband's side, refusing to believe, and—_**

_Anakin, you're breaking my heart! You're going down a path I can't follow_.

Nothing she had said had caused him even momentary pause…_Anakin, all I want is your love…_and when he thought she had betrayed him, how he had turned against her. Even now, those invisible hands choked and tore, and as her world turned on her, her soul fell apart, and she couldn't breathe—

Obi-Wan stopped Anakin too late; her husband had already taken everything from her.

_Is Anakin all right?_ she had asked her beloved's mentor. He had not answered, and she had known: the man she loved was dead.

**_Once upon a time a queen…a senator…a woman in love…a wife…a ghost, a dead thing_**.

Anakin's children are beautiful, so beautiful…but without Ani, this family is not the one she dreamed of, and their cries burn her broken heart.

_Ani!redpaindeathmachineagonyskin_.

Luke! she cries out. Leia! Oh, gods, what is happening to your father? How can he feel such agony in death? What will I do, now, without him?

_Ani!burnedandbleeding__, seethinghatred, Padméwhereareyou?_

Anakin…beloved, monster… She can't do it without him…

_The Jedi turned against me. Don't _you_ turn against me!_

_Anakin!_ she wants to scream. _I am on your side! I have _always _been on your side!_

As she takes her last breath, she sees:

She hates him. Because she loves him, because she always has and always will, she hates him more than she knew she could hate anyone.

_Once upon a time, the people's Queen died from grief, from losing her beloved, and left her children alone in a galaxy that would betray them…_

It was not the ending she had dreamed of.

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Please R&R!

.Tjz


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